T.I.T. Episode 39: And So It Goes…

PodArt39

•    Welcome to episode 39
•    Thanks for the Birthday wishes!
•    On turning 35…
•    Unpleasant Birthday news first thing in the morning!
•    Growing up with MJ in the background
•    Did you own parachute pants?  Thriller jacket?
•    Who knows what really happened…
•    My birthdays have toned down as I age
•    Tom doesn’t care for the Thai birthday tradition
•    High rise roof top dining in Bangkok
•    Lovely city from on high!
•    Saw the Transformers 2
•    Tom is a special effects junkie
•    Rude comments over on the Youtube
•    Anti-government conspiracy theories
•    Don’t tell me what happened, when I was there!!!
•    The latest bit of bad press for Thailand
•    Beware of those shops at the airport
•    British tourists got scammed for thousands
•    Corruption is beyond endemic here
•    The root of the problem is….see above!
•    One week to go till Summer Break
•    A sad day….Tom gets personal
•    We have been dreading this new chapter
•    600 dollars a month isn’t enough
•    Long distance relationships….
•    Is distance the same no matter how far?
•    Emails and comments from listeners
•    Love me some Tigger!

•    Closing remarks and love!

Email me at tominthai@gmail.com, please go Comment on my page or call my voice line and leave me a voice comment for the show!

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You Know You’ve Been in Thailand to Long When…

my hood

I know right?  Two times in the same week…Could it really be?  Anyways, I was checking the blog this afternoon when I got home from work and it occurred to me that I should post a counterpart to the “You know your from Alabama when…” as I’ve not had the pleasure of residing there for nearly a decade.  Therefore, I poked around the internet and found MANY such lists related to foreigners living in Thailand.  So, I pieced together a list of those i found funny yet relevant to my life here and most, if not all, of these are also 100% true.  Sooooo, I thought I’d share yet another list with your reading pleasure and I hope you find it as comical as I did and do on a day to day basis here.  Also, if any questions occur to you while you are reading through the list then please feel free to post them.  I will be more than happy to do my best to elaborate!  Much love as always and will podcast over the weekend!

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You Know You’ve Been in Thailand to Long When…

1. You can go for weeks without toilet paper.

2. You don’t flinch when another car or taxi drives you down the wrong side of the street.

3. You decline to wear a motorbike helmet because it’ll mess up your hair.

4. You stand in the shadow of a telephone pole while waiting for a taxi or bus.

5. It is no longer surprising that the only decision made at a staff meeting is what the group will be having for lunch immediately following the meeting.

6. Hearing “Mai Mii” (Don’t have) or “Mai Dai” (cannot) for the 500th time in a day doesn’t annoy you anymore.

7. You no longer wonder how a civil servant, who earns 400 USD per month drives a brand new Mercedes.

8. Curry is perfectly acceptable breakfast food as long as it has a fried egg on top.

9. Au Bon Pain or the Sizzler is a chic classy hang out serving good food.

10. A policeman stops you for a minor infraction and you automatically reach for your wallet, and not to get your license.

11. You are not surprised when 3-4 men with a ladder show up to change a light bulb or change the filters in the air conditioner.

12. You instinctively know to look both ways twice before crossing a one-way street.

13. You wonder where the salt and chilli mix is for fresh fruit.

14. You’d rather SMS someone than actually meet and talk.

15. You are careful to cover your mouth when picking your teeth, but openly pick your nose at the dinner table.

16. You keep a roll of toilet paper on your dinner table, but not in the bathroom cause it doesn’t go in the toliet.

17. A hot pizza right out of the oven is smothered in ketchup and oregano and it looks just fine for dinner.

18. You know first hand that “Love You Long Time” is not a satirical quote from Full Metal Jacket, but an actual saying.

19. You know when people say they’re “going to bed” that they’ll actually be partying until 2AM and beyond in a cylindrical nightclub resembling a spaceship.

20. “Sexpats,” “Pirates,” “Yellow Fever” and “Rice Queens” are all in your vocabulary.

21. You can shame a group of prostitutes with one contemptuous stare.

22. You understand why drivers flash their 4 indicator lights when driving straight on at intersections.

23.  You just smile, shake your head and sigh when the waiter correctly repeats your order and yet the cook makes something completely different.

24. When shopping at a supermarket, you peak into another farang’s (Caucasian foreigner) cart and wonder to yourself what other farang’s eat.

25. You quietly mutter “farang” (Caucasian foreigner) to your Thai friend/partner when you see other foreigners in public.

26. You regularly fumble for five minutes to find a 10 baht coin despite 10 people waiting in line behind you to use the machine.

26. You know that dogs are animals best given a wide berth or avoided rather than attempt to pet.

27. Touts and Indian tailors ignore you when you walk past their shops.

28. Not only does it not bother you that a lady is cleaning the stall next to the one you are using, but you are not even startled when she begins to sweep/mop under the door of your stall.

29. You are adept at examining knock-off sunglasses and watches with a discriminating eye.

30. You can tell the difference between the “I-have-no-idea-what-you’re-talking-about” smile and one of genuine amusement.

Making Window Washers Think Twice…

So, I saw this commercial on Thai television the other day and thought it was hilarious.  If you have ever had the misfortune of being stuck sitting in Bangkok traffic for any amount of time then you would have encountered this situation yourself many times before.  You stop for the red light and suddenly an army of beggars selling roses, papers, wreaths, and most annoying of all…the window washer boys.  These street boys will walk up and immediately spritz a bit of their dirty water onto your front window and start cleaning it with a filthy looking rag, despite any and all protests from drivers.  I’ve seen friends beat on the glass shouting no no no! and even just quickly moving up in traffic in an effort to get away from this nuisance.  It is because the resulting state that the grimey water and filthy rag leaves on your window screen is so very far from being squeaky clean.  Therefore, Here is the answer to this problem once and for all.  You’ll scratch your head and wonder, why didn’t i think of that as well.  Anyways…..have a watch and a giggle from Tom in Thailand today!

Wanda just really sums it up…

I just saw this video clip on youtube and thought I had to share it with you guys. I hope you take a little time to have a watch and hope it makes you smile as much as it did for me.  It really burns me up how alot of the opponents to gay marriage go on and on about the so called “sanctity” of marriage, and how “we” have to protect the “sanctity” of marriage.  If that’s true then why aren’t these same people or groups of people standing outside of courthouses all over the US protesting the divorce rates in the country? Why aren’t they spending as much time protesting about drive-through wedding chapels in Los Vegas? How much “sanctity” could these marriages possess when an Elvis impersonator officiates the ceremony?  If you really really held marriage as the sanctified holy institution then where is the consistency?  I’m just tired of my civil rights being an issue for people that it doesn’t affect at all in any way.  I wish those that jump up and down to complain about the government exploring the possibility of providing every citizen with equal rights would just mind their own business. Anyways, enough of my on the soapbox so go enjoy the video clip and see ya soon!